Just an update before I turn in . . .
Last week, I finished my third go ’round with a certain hormone replacement med. I have done this same therapy twice before, once in high school, again in college, and now at almost 30 yrs old, my body STILL doesn’t seem to behave well on it’s own. Oh, and just two years ago, I underwent a different therapy to do something entirely different, yet it was still related to my diagnosis, so I guess that totals FOUR rounds of various hormone therapies. It’s been a rough two weeks, and I’m still struggling with feeling well. Probably the most regrettable though, has been the past 5 months of neglect for myself . . . finally leading up to my caving into taking the meds.
I can only imagine what a snore of a person I must have been to be around and how miserably I’ve failed at being a gracious, thankful, and respectful wife. Unbalanced is putting it lightly. Teetering on insanity is probably way too kind. Flat out not being myself and feeling cruddy — yup, that begins to scratch the surface alright.
Good news is my body is responding favorably and it would seem that things won’t be as rough on me with this latest treatment than it was the past two times. I think what’s helping is that I was prescribed a newer slow-release version of the same med rather than the injections they’ve administered in the past. Thank you LORD — on behalf of my husband, my doggie, my family, my co-workers — thank you!
So, now that I’m slowly coming out of my malfunctioning hormonal fog, I’m seeing some places I need improvement on. Rather, I’ve been convicted, awakened, startled into realization, and given direction on some crucial areas of my life that I’ve allowed to go unshapened and unsharpened. My husband! Not necessarily him, but the attention (negative and positive) that I give him and how I choose to speak to him and act towards him. Boy, oh, boy . . .
I was given the book For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn when I first came on staff with North Point/Browns Bridge. It’s taken a while for me to get around to it, but I finally started digging into it yesterday.
Ouch! is all I have to say.
I’m struggling with the content because it’s so hard to see that I’m the one in need of “fixing” when it would sure be great if God could just go about “fixing” all the other people around me. Ha! I know — I’m a dingbat!
Since I’m just starting to really get into this book, I won’t talk about it now or how deeply to my marrow it is already reaching. I’ll move my thoughts over to the Gonna Dig, Digging, Dug page when I’m done and give my summary there.
I will say this though . . . considering the crumbling marriages that are highlighted in the news and the downfalls of great leaders to the lust of infidelity, I tremendously hope that this book saturates and shakes me to the core and revolutionizes and revives a newer, better, and more God-like ability for me to respect and cherish the gift He has given me in my husband, Eric. (Eric, you are so, so worth it! You’re a gifted and admirable person who continues to amaze me with your zeal for knowledge and life!)
Oh — feel free to comment on this book if you’ve read it! Or, just leave a general comment! Your thoughts are welcome here!