Well, okay, if there is any truth to that jeer, then we’ll give it a try! Today, Eric and I celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary! (Last week we . . . ahem . . . happened to remember that we were at the 12-year mark since first meeting and quickly falling in love.) Oh, the romance that can ensue over a milkshake ordered in a drive-thru!
I’m going to be transparent here friends; two weeks ago, I would have had serious doubts that I would feel as happy and joyfully wedded as I do right now. I literally had one of those freak-out moments of “is this it?”, “what’s happening now is not what I signed up for”, “do I call my mom to ask if there is a return policy?”, and “I’m sure he wants out — if I were him and lived with me, I’d want out, too!” Yep, in the years since marrying, it was the. lowest. I. had. felt. I had some deep conversations with my mom (which to my pleasure, she cleverly led me to more realistic and Godly thinking) and a much needed shopping trip with my dear friend, Kim, to IKEA.
After about four or five seemingly endless, silent, and weird days, we both sat down to lunch at Zaxby’s and let ‘er rip. We sat there and communicated our hurts, our goals, our lack of goals, our best years, our crazy duo-antics, our busyness and lack of unplugging, some disappointments, and so on. We quickly began seeing light piercing through the darkness that had become our last week. I know Eric’s love language is ‘words of affirmation’, so I did my best to encourage his spirit. Imagine this if you will — it worked! And because he knew my language is ‘quality time’, he sat there allowing me to talk and convey emotions all while not looking at his phone that was blowing up with text messages and phone calls. (Sorry KidStuf staff for his being late to your meeting!)
So, this is why the messages I’ve heard at MarriedLife Live, marriage enrichment confs., books, couples devotions, and all that say to work together, don’t let work run your life, discover and celebrate each other’s unique differences. Hmmm . . .
To take things a step further, last week, I got to see a glimpse of Eric on paper — his Right Path Profile. At first, I wasn’t looking forward to a meeting at work that was all about personality profiles, but my two hours in this meeting was an answer to an unspoken prayer. Once I began to become more aware of myself and the unique way that God had created me — why things make me tick the way they do — I was almost restless thinking how I couldn’t wait to see Eric’s profile. How does he respond to bad news and good news? How does he prefer to socialize? Why does it frustrate him when he doesn’t feel like he’s part of a team? I poured over his profile a few days later just seeing a tangible computation of the beauty of God’s creation in my husband. Why hadn’t I known these things 7 years ago?! This stuff makes sense!
So, fast-forward a bit to today. We celebrated tonight over a great dinner at a new restaurant, a mixture of light-hearted and in-depth conversations, good wine, and a decadent dessert. Now that we’re moving towards nine years, we’re harnessing a cheesy saying of positivity: “Nine is Sublime!”
So, if I could “take a picture ’cause it would last longer”, here it is . . .